this might worry you

Drinking alcohol – time at supported living

I was wandering amlessly around the square one evening because I couldn’t stand spending time at home. I was getting jip off the staff, so I started going on walks up and down the road. before I met the four people who i’d thought were my friends, I was getting bullied by the people who were hanging around in the square and I kept going back every time I went out of my flat, the bullying got to much that I stayed in eventually. Staying in caused problems with the people who were supposed to be “professional” They were yelling at me, hissing. Stuff like “what the hell you playing at!!!”
and “COME BACK HERE!!!” while at the same time I had to put up with violence from the tenants and other types from outside. I had knife threats, burgled, cyberbullying, fireworks at my window one of which hit one of the walls of my bedroom, mugged, several assaults and huh hum on my mums birthday, which I didn’t get to explain about because her and her boyfriend had a go at me because they thought I called her a rude word.
Before that 1st incident, I was happy going out with those people, but the persuaded me to give them money to by alchohol, they gave me a mix of vodka and fanta, which they said I could have share. I thought that I was having fun the first couple of nights I went out, then Damian left the group and it all went wrong after that. We stayed down town and started going to different locations, which were lit by street lamps where we shared the alcohol. Then we started going to the big park to join a group of people and I wasn’t prepared of what they had in mind of doing. When I got assaulted the first time, they went in with big sticks and stinging nettles, I had no defence. Second time I thought I would wave a stick about to ward them off but it didn’t work. The third time was when I got my phone swiped out my hand, so I went home. They rang me to say that they got the phone, so I got a taxi again down town
I got the taxi down to KFC where they said they were at, I went for a walk with them. They led me to the park where they left me bruised, —–, unclothed and I was left laying on the park floor like I was dead
it went quiet…..
then on, I started drinking all kind of spirits and all types of beers to ignore the world

the rule I made was to stay in and shut the f up
people hurt you and you don’t win

dealing with the enemy

 

I went back to my house after being at the inland library. I decided to watch tv because I was feeling tired. I got up to make myself a cupp of tea, and then I heard footsteps, I looked at the CCTV monitor and I saw Jeff had come back. ‘not again,’ I thought, so I grabbed a knife and hid against the wall next to the door. I heard the click of the handle, and then the door started to slowly open.

‘I’ve come to finish you off Hayley’.

Then when he came in and while his back was turned, I quickly slammed the door shut and without hesitation, I screamed and violently jabbed the knife into his back.

 

I Laughed joyously as he fell to the floor

 

when everything was :)

Skive to the beach

the bell rang for period 5. Iwas a bit tired, so I decided to go

to the beach that was alittle bit further up the road. I

remember the last time I went, the soothing sounds of the

crashing waves didnt fully wake me until my alarm went

off.

The one time I got up was to let my long, wavy hair down.

A while after, I got up and down I walked to the lovely

moving sea

CSH

I was at the computer playing deathmatch, when the message window popped up with the game shutting down. ‘Hello Charlotte!’ I ignored it and carried on with the game I was playing…..

Then, almost immediately it switched to the chat window with the camera light coming on. I gazed at it and looked puzzled. I tried to switch back, but it was fixed. I kept pressed ESC and then alt f4, but nothing happened. ‘What the fuck’ I said quietly to myself. ‘Charlotte!!’ A voice called from downstairs, I looked behind me ‘dinner, tuna pasta!’ I got up and then I heard ‘leave this room and I’ll destroy her’ I went over to the door, I tried to stall from going down, ‘I’m not hungry’ I started to get agitated ‘please would you jus….’ Then I slammed the door shut. ‘It’s in the microwave!!!’ She finished saying.

It went quiet and I slowly approached the computer, eyes fixed on the webcam and I stopped, ‘hahaha’ it said ‘sit down Charlotte, I need to talk to you. The other girls that I have talked to had committed suicide. Hope I don’t persuade you to commit suicide.’ I went to sit down . I started to yell ‘oh dear, time to take your pill , Charlotte’ I sat back and replied ‘ but…I’ve already taken a pill today’ I questioned it about what he does and he said that he helped people who are run down. ‘Take your pill, Charlotte’ I looked at the jar and picked it up. I took a sip of water to make my pill easier to swallow and then I put it in my mouth, tipped my head back and swallowed. ‘Now take five’ suddenly I was sick and I went to the bathroom and I ran some tissue under the warm tap, then I fell and crawled over to where I was sick, staying out of view of the camera ‘ where are you, Charlotte, stay with me’ I started to rub it and I replied ‘ it will smell, if I leave it’ I struggled with my speech. I grew even more tired and then I pushed myself up using the desk. I picked up the jar, I heard ‘go on take five,’ I couldn’t take anymore, so I took the top off of the jar, then I tipped the whole jar in my mouth, the I picked up a bit of paper and I scribbled his user name. ‘This is my last note, and they’ll find you’ I started getting dizzy, ‘stay with me, Charlotte,’ my vision started to deteriorate ‘ they won’t find me, Charlotte.’ It beeped, then went quiet. I paused and then I went to guess where the door was. I opened it, I fell and started crying.

I heard the sound of rushing footsteps.

Aj

The chirping of the alarm soundedtwo hour before it was due. In frustration I decided that the best thing to do was to whack it on the top to shut it up. I got up and saw it was five in the morning. I turned on my bedside light on and saw that my pillow was drenched in blood. I stumbled down the corridor and into the bathroom. I turned on the light and the first thing I did, was to look in the mirror and shouted, ‘ Jesus Chris!!!’…..

I looked in the mirror and saw the top left of my head slowly weeping with blood rolling down my face, and then I looked and saw that the blood left streaks and patches right down to the tips of my blonde hair.

I reached up to the shelves to get a box of tissues and then I heard a click like the front door was opening, I froze, then turned to look at the bathroom door. I heard footsteps that started off quiet and gradually became louder and louder as they came up the corridor; my breathing was slowly increasing, then I saw a shadow of a figure standing there and clenching his fists.

I pushed the door, but as soon as I tried, he kicked it off its hinges and I started to walk backwards in fear. I was thinking about his punch and how hard it was going to be, before I had chance to, I suddenly blinked and I felt his big-handed knuckles digging into my left shoulder. I fell against the wall and then he threw me onto the floor. The light suddenly turned off and I heard laughing.

While presuming I was on the floor, I’d noticed that the lights were off and the surrounding laughing I could not hear. Suddenly the phone rang: ‘Oh shite,’ I thought. It stopped and I heard it had gone to answer. ‘Hi you’ve reached the household of Anna J. Please leave a message after the tone.’ It beeped and all I could hear after that was a deep voice and then the sound of the hang up. I got up and struggled my way out of the bathroom and down the corridor. My vision blurred so I used the walls as guidance, trying to be careful and looking out for the missing door in-between the bathroom and the lounge.

I eventually got into the lounge, after noticing the warmth of the radiator. I felt the wall above it until I found the lightswitch, I flicked it and my vision got worse I closed my eyes, and then i slowly opened them, only to make out the outline of the phone. I slowly walked, narrowly missing the coffee table, which seemed like a blur. I picked up the phone and I could only just see the numbers only because the phone luckily had a big keypad.

I thought of calling the police, but then I thought that they’ve got better things to do than to waste their time believing a 14 year old schoolgirl, so I pressed the down button twice with the green following. I pressed it again for the loudspeaker to come on. It rang and at the same time my vision was improving. It rang and at the same time my vision was improving. It kept ringing but no answer, and then I decided to wait and see if I could survive eight o’clock which is when school starts. I hung up, grabbed my towel and decided to go for a shower.

As I walked down the corridor, I started to look at the damage that had been done. I lifted my pyjama top half way up, I looked and the pace of my breathing quickened and then I quickly dashed to the shower and turned it on. While it was running, I took my bloodstained nightclothes off and all I could see was my body that was covered in blood, I sighed at seeing the scratches and the bruises that had stained as I washed off the blood, I cried and then I got out. I slipped on my bathrobe and went out the house as soon as possible, and then I walked across the field, so I could avoid being seen.

School

I could see the school gates, and I noticed that they were shut. ‘Ssssshhhh….’ I said quietly to myself. I got there and I saw the code panel, which had only just been put up. It was dark so I thought I’d be hard to notice. I keyed in what the code could be, because I was late getting out of homework club the night before and the code was keyed in when everyone had left and I was just leaving before the school had shut.

I went to the panel and keyed in the code, 5827: it buzzed. I smiled and walked in like I was feeling lost so I would not raise suspicion. I walked in and looked around, I could not see anyone or anything to call for help. I walked for a bit and found myself going towards the canteen and yanked at the door, but it would not open. Then something caught my eye, a phone was lying on the floor, with its green lights flashing, so I picked it up and checked if it was working and it was. I decided to call Ellie. It rang and went straight to voicemail, I spoke and started to cry, ‘ Hi Ellie. I got roughed up. I’m at BMS now, somehow I’m bleeding and I’m feeling dizzy.’  I looked at the big digital clock, which was displaying itself in the canteen and I saw that it was flashing on 7:00. Then the mono message tone went, and it said ‘I’m just coming round the corner,’ a couple of seconds later I saw her walking though the gates in her uniform, ready for the school day.

She ran over to me and I could see she was looking at the damage that had been done to my face and she said ‘ you’re coming to my house, now!!!’

Oop, I took the whole jar

I got to the front door, and Ellie went in first. She released her black hair from her hairband, shook her head and then went into the front room. I went in the opposite direction, she stopped me and then I turned around. ‘ what ya doing? She asked. I turned and carried on towards the bathroom.

I noticed that she wasn’t following. I got there and went to the cupboard; I carefully opened it, so that she wouldn’t know what I was doing. I looked all around the cupboard and saw a jar with a label, but I saw that she’d written over it in red capital letters,’ TAKE THESE AND LIKELY DEATH!’ I smiled and took it off the shelves, careful not to not to make it rattle. I unscrewed the top, tipped the jar to look at the contents and then I stopped and thought that it would happen again. I carefully tipped all the pills into my hand, it rattled. I heard running, but as soon as she came in, I quickly put them in my mouth, ‘ Anna, no!’ She screamed, I quickly diluted it with water then she knocked the jar out of my hand and gave me a hug. I slowly lowered myself to the floor, with her holding on to me and my vision slowly blurred